An old woman is reflecting her life, talking about her family and her late husband. Some of her family members have already died. She has no regrets in life and seems to be aware that she is already in the last chapter of her life. This old woman is the grandmother of filmmaker Supriya Suri. Three woman of different generations take a trip to places of their ancestors and finally to the holy city Varanasi at the Ganges River. Main Tenu Phir Milangi is Supriya Suris third long documentary. After Maestro a Portrait – a Film on Buddhadeb Dasgupta and Aruna Vasudev – Mother of Asian Cinema, her newest film deals with her own family history.
They talk a lot about religion and the very colorful and complex Indian mythology. Sometimes, especially the elder women falls into mantras or prayers, some spoken some almost sung. But for now, the film cultivates a rather sober almost ascetic form, like a report on a journey and a contrast to their talk about Indian mythology. Later one realizes that it is not only a journey to places but as well a journey through time. After a while, this seemingly sober film fills as if by itself with different moods and emotions. And very soon, one realizes that especially this prosaic tone is the cause of a very relaxed but perceptive seeing. There is also a relationship between movement (they travel by train or walk through long but narrow lanes) and statics when they sit and reflect. As we have to listen them often talking, sometimes about very mundane things like what to do with the things one leaves after the end of life, sometimes very concrete memories and very often about religion and mythology, it is very interesting that the very worldly affaires in life and the spiritual ones go hand in hand. The sharp limitation between the material and spiritual world we are now used in the West, does not seem to exist in India. There are more nuances in this film, in the spoken language but as well in its images. These nuances are often small, sometimes deliberately hardly perceptible. In retrospect, I still wonder that these images are so much more evocative than it seems at the beginning. Martin Scorsese´s famous quote that “Cinema is a matter about what is in and what is out” is here often very helpful.
The women stay at the holy river Ganges. The heaven is heavily clouded and together with the river it is a very greyish environment. Very prosaic images which are far away from all the colorful travel brochures. In another moment, they ask a priest for help. They are looking for some recordings about their ancestors. The priest seems beside his mantras and prayers very well organized. He looks into a huge kind of register book. And this spiritual man has at the same time the eagerness of a historian. It is a small moment but it is very significant for this relationship between the world and the hereafter. The impact of the film is not only what it shows but as well what it evokes. There is a moment when the grandmother crosses a long bridge. For now this event seems to be recorded accidentally and not forced. But as soon as I remember this moment, this image will be loaded up to a moving impression of the probably last big journey of an old woman.
The journey is over and the film´s prologue is like a very Ozu-like echo. The end has a moment which is very moving despite its very mundane event and the the final scene from Ozu´s masterpiece Banshun (Late Spring) came to my mind. The old woman meets her daughter on the street. Her daughter bought her some fruits. She asked her she wants to come with her but the old woman answers softly that she wants to be alone with herself. Even though it is an every day farewell, there is a slight idea of panic felt by the daughter worried about the fragile old lady. Alone in her apartment, the old woman peels a citrus fruit. She is framed like in a portrait photograph, a piece of time frozen for the eternity. She looks like absorbed by her memories. If the memory of this concrete trip or the memory of the journey called life - I do not know. These seemingly casually images turn very soon in an unforgettable film experience. After sleeping a night over it (like we do after a long and moving journey), the film appears to me like a beautiful, at times melancholic meditation about the fleetingness of life. Main Tenu Phir Milangi is probably Supriya Suri´s most beautiful film to date.
Rüdiger Tomczak
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